


Tension

by still_lycoris



Category: Blake's 7
Genre: Angst, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-01-03
Updated: 2014-01-03
Packaged: 2018-01-07 07:40:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,271
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1117284
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/still_lycoris/pseuds/still_lycoris
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Blake watches Avon sleep and tries to puzzle things out.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Tension

Avon had fallen asleep.

It took Blake a moment to realise that it had happened and when he did, he thought faintly that it might be a trick. Avon did not fall asleep. Avon never fell asleep, not after … this. He was almost always the first to move away, that was simply how it was. Blake wasn’t actually sure he’d ever seen Avon asleep in the entire time that they’d spent on the Liberator.

He peered at Avon suspiciously. The man’s eyes were closed., lips slightly parted and the breathing was regular. Avon wasn’t the type to fake sleep – or rather, he was, but only if there was some benefit attached. Blake wasn’t quite sure that there was any obvious benefit attached to faking sleep now.

No, Avon had simply fallen asleep.

Blake wasn’t quite sure how he felt about that.

It had rules, this thing between them. Largely unspoken rules, but rules none-the-less. Avon sleeping, that seemed like something that broke a rule, even if Blake wasn’t quite sure what the rule might be. It just didn’t feel quite right somehow. But then, it probably wasn’t quite right. Nothing between them was ever “quite right.” It was one of the things that Blake had learned to accept and didn’t generally allow to disturb him. There was no point being disturbed. It was simply the way things were now.

Avon looked different while sleeping. His face looked smoother somehow and his mouth wasn’t twisted in its usual way. It was interesting to look at and Blake took the opportunity to simply stare. He wouldn’t have expected Avon to be the one to fall asleep. Perhaps that was why Avon always resisted when Blake wanted them to lie down somewhere together. Avon always seemed quite happy against the walls. It was always Blake who pushed for a couch or a chair. Avon didn’t always go along with that.

It was strange, this thing between them. Strange and maybe worrying, if Blake thought too hard about it. He had it under control though, he was sure of that. It was tension release, that was all, and it worked well for that. Both of them needed to get rid of frustrations and it worked well when they did it on each other. Nobody else had to be involved that way and no damage was done. They didn’t hurt anybody or anything. Well, once or twice a few minor things had been damaged. That time Avon had slammed him into the desk so hard that they’d knocked everything off, that had been a little difficult to explain. Luckily, it had only been a few bowls, they’d been replaceable. Blake had tried to make sure they were more careful after that. He didn’t know if any of the others knew about this. He didn’t really want to know. He rather hoped that they didn’t.

He couldn’t remember which of them had started it. It had been mutual really, just a sudden need that they’d both understood and both reacted to. They never talked about it. Blake didn’t want to talk about it. This was probably the most he’d ever thought about it.

It was usually him who initiated it. It was easy enough to do, he simply found Avon alone somewhere. Never any words – or at least, not about that. They were often arguing, but then that was what they did. Sometimes when they were alone, the argument spilt into this, touching and grinding and furious panted breath.

No mouths. Never mouths. It was one of the unspoken rules. They did not kiss, they just didn’t. Once, they nearly had. They’d been pressed tight together, so very, very tight and Avon’s mouth had been just above his, hovering and he’d felt Avon’s breath on his face and for a second, he thought the rule would break and he wasn’t sure that he minded, he wouldn’t have protested if Avon had just ducked his head, just a little …

But Avon hadn’t and the moment had passed. Probably for the best really. Avon wasn’t the kissing type. And it might have made him angry. This wasn’t supposed to make them angry afterwards, it was supposed to just … well. Just _be_ and then not be and they could part without having to think. Thinking about it was probably breaking one of the rules and usually put them off.

He’d made Avon think about it once, he was sure of that. He couldn’t remember why it had happened but he’d bitten Avon, bitten him on the shoulder and Avon had made the strangest noise and had arched against him, suddenly clutching far more tightly than Blake had ever felt before and so he’d bitten again, harder this time and Avon had cried out and come in his hand far quicker than normal. He’d shoved Blake away immediately and stormed out and Blake had known he’d stepped over a boundary and that if he valued this at all, he’d never mention it ever again. As it was, Avon had avoided him for a while. He hadn’t wanted anything from Blake – or if he had, he’d weighed it up against that and decided his anger outweighed anything else.

Avon didn’t like to lose control. Blake didn’t either. It was part of the reason there were so many rules, the reason it was such a competition between them. He knew that Avon was always seeking out weaknesses, trying to remember what Blake liked and what he didn’t, trying to see what might make Blake falter, trying to find out anything he could that he could use. Blake couldn’t judge him for it, he was doing the same thing after all. Seeking and probing for anything that he could find, anything that he could use. He wasn’t sure if either of them had learned anything very much yet. Well. Avon had probably learned that Blake was more partial to lying down than he was to rutting against the walls.

Avon stirred and murmured something incoherent, his fingers twitching restlessly. Perhaps he was dreaming about computers. It was slightly difficult to imagine Avon dreaming about anything else. Well, except perhaps wealth. He could imagine Avon dreaming of that all right.

He trailed a finger over Avon’s cheek, just to see what would happen. Avon shivered a little, his lips moving in a soundless murmur this time. Blake withdrew his hand, feeling a little guilty. It felt wrong, somehow. It wasn’t what Avon would want.

Not that Avon always did what Blake wanted. After that disastrous trip to Earth, all Blake had wanted was pain, a just, furious sort of pain to remove everything from his mind. He’d gone to Avon, sure he could rely on him for that. Instead, Avon had been almost gentle, almost kind, stroking his hair, refusing to let Blake drag him into their usual roughness. Blake had a feeling that it had been Avon’s own way of showing his power, showing that he had some control and that he would always use it. But perhaps that was a harsh way of looking at it. Maybe Avon had genuinely wanted to be kind.

He sighed softly and pushed the thoughts away. Carefully, he eased himself back from Avon’s warmth. Avon stirred and fussed a little and after a second, Blake touched his hand, waiting until Avon had settled again. Blake made sure that Avon was decent, then quietly slipped from the room. Let Avon think what he wanted when he woke up. They could simply pretend it had never happened, like they had plenty of times before.

It worked best like that.

**Author's Note:**

> Written for the 2013 livejournal 12dayschristmas challenge


End file.
